COMMUNICATING WITH POWER

Tribes of howler monkeys or packs of coyotes might seem ferocious at first glance (you don't want to interfere with their next meal) but most of the snaps, snarls, growls, bared teeth and bites are merely "posturing for position". Study them to learn how to deal with threats. They'll also show you how to behave in crowds and how to climb the social ladder. As they live in large groups, they have the social cues down pat.

In America’s jungles, where the competition is rather intense, individuals of every social order learn how to deal with power.

Even if members of a species might squabble, the spats rarely end in bloodshed. Disputes are usually quickly resolved and daily business is very soon back to normal. Nature's management principle is « altruistic self-interest » so order is established as a show of personal power. From positions of power, negotiations are settled and trespasses can then be easily forgiven:
La noblesse oblige.

Simply stated, acquiring personal power means knowing what you want and letting others know it with the necessary degree of assertion. As things can get rather testy when everyone focuses on the same banana, if you are well understood, it is more likely that your needs will be met and your place in the overall scheme of things will be respected.

Communicating with power means having the confidence you will reach your goals and the realization that the people you exchange with can help you. Powerful people thus empower others and encourage them to express themselves openly. In this way you can see where and how they can be of help… or not.

Acquiring the power to actualize your needs means developing five important aspects of yourself: A strong physical image, emotional authority, intellectual assertiveness, spiritual accessibility and transactional force.
  1. A strong physical image is a presence consistent with self-esteem: Walk proud, stand tall with your shoulders back and fix a steady gaze. Consider that you have something of value to offer the world, look people in the eye, greet them with a firm and friendly handshake. In a sure, even tone, tell them who you are and what you want. Use body language - movement and gesture - to emphasize your point and display your passion. Then wait for complete answers.
  2. Emotional authority will come from calming your inner dialogue while you wait. You do this by having confidence in your abilities and by recognizing that you merit success. Deal with the answers given to you as if you expect others to find solutions to problems or limits and communicate your willingness to help. And then creatively suggest how your needs can be served. Radiate warmth, confidence and project an honest "can do attitude" that shows your will to work out the details.
  3. Intellectual assertiveness means being honest, direct and tenacious. It implies having self-respect and thereby respect for others. From this proactive position you'll see your own goals, needs and desires as equal to those of others. You assert yourself by being ready to cooperate, negotiate and influence. And then stick to it… act with "unbending intent".
  4. Spiritual accessibility means being making yourself available to others, and then listening to them with empathy. Powerful people try to understand others before wanting to be understood by them because they realize ideas have transactional force. They invest in that force by establishing a network of collaborators with whom they exchange, share connections and get support for their interests.
  5. Transactional force is what continues to communicate after you are no longer in physical contact with others. What do your ideas say after you've gone? Don't muddy up your stated needs, desires, instructions or requests, etc., with meaningless patter, slang, non-descriptive words or jargon. Get to the point in a clear and concise way. Develop an effective vocabulary to tell others how they can help you. Leave notes and cue cards!
Both the congo and the coyote have discovered that communicating with power will get them everything they require from life.